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The Psychology of Conflict Creation in Narcissists
Journey Joy
August 02, 2022
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I’ve often asked myself why narcissists feel the need to create fights and conflicts. It can be a confusing and frustrating experience, as it seems like the narcissist enjoys causing pain and chaos.
Photo by Sinitta Leunen on Unsplash
However, after doing some research and talking to a few narcissists, I’ve come to realize that there’s more to the story than just pure enjoyment of causing pain.
In fact, many narcissists create fights and conflicts as a way of regulating their own emotions and feeling in control.
For narcissists, feeling in control is a crucial aspect of their personality. They need to feel as though they have power over their environment and the people in it.
When they’re upset or hurt, they don’t want to feel that pain themselves. Instead, they project it onto others as a way of avoiding the discomfort.
By creating conflicts, narcissists are able to shift the focus away from their own pain and onto the other person. They can also use the conflict as a way to assert their dominance and control over the situation. This can make them feel powerful and in control, which helps to regulate their emotions and stabilize their sense of self.
Of course, this doesn’t mean that all narcissists get pleasure from causing others pain. Some may genuinely believe that they’re doing the right thing by creating conflicts, or they may simply be so caught up in their own emotions that they don’t realize the impact they’re having on others.
However, the fact remains that narcissists are often lost and in pain. They may not know how to deal with their own emotions in a healthy way, so they project them onto others as a coping mechanism. This can be incredibly damaging to those around them, particularly if they’re in a position of power or authority.
If you’re dealing with a narcissist, it’s important to remember that their behavior is not your fault. You deserve to be treated with kindness and respect, and it’s okay to set boundaries or walk away from the situation if you need to.
Thank you for reading :)
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